what about this?
what about this?
their music pissed off the dance floor
so the dance floor took off
there was a broken harmonica
where his heart used to be
record stores vs. Spotify
the world’s been taking selfies since then
instead of playing the piano
which is pretty: fucked up
their music pissed off the dance floor
so the dance floor took off
but not before taking a selfie
the dance floor took a selfie
and then it took off
because it couldn’t stand their music
so he was like, fuck dance floors
he liked their music
even though nobody was playing it
anymore
he liked their music
and he liked the fact
that he no longer gave a shit about McDonalds
and he liked astronomy
and Taylor Swift songs
and talking to the lone hippo
at the zoo
because with these things
like Taylor Swift and the hippo
with these things he at least knew where he stood
instead of where he was standing
which was nowhere near the goddamn dance floor
that’s for sure
because the dance floor had split
fine, fucking move on with it
but his feet just wouldn’t quit bitching
even though they’d proved clearly incompetent
in the genre of dance
he wished he’d have taken lessons or something
when he’d still had the chance
he wished that Bill Murray would win an Oscar
he wished he’d stuck with it when he was younger
and gotten really good at Tai Chi
instead of giving up because he’d injured his testicle
doing David Carradine’s Tai Chi moves from
the book Learn Tai Chi the David Carradine way
or whatever it was called
around 12 pages in, following all the instructions
and diagrams and charts, he’d twisted in a way
which had caused his left testicle to twist
in a way that left testicles where never meant to be twisted
twisted to the point where the pain damn near became sentient
and started its own Facebook page and ran for President
that pain causing him to go to the doctor
where he was forced to tell the pretty medical assistant
who’d asked him what he was there for that
I twisted my hmmmmdhfm doing David Carradine Tai Chi.
and because he’d fumbled the word ‘testicle’
she was forced to ask him to repeat himself
and because he’d already discovered that it was pretty much
impossible to say the word ‘testicle’ in front of this woman
because maybe he loved her
he rephrased everything until it came out as
I think I hurt my left nut
Tags: David Carradine, hippos, love, poetry, tai chi, Taylor Swift, writing
