My Foot Fell Asleep And It’s Having Those Dreams

  My Foot Fell Asleep And It’s Having Those Dreams   my foot fell asleep and it’s having those dreams again, where   we alphabetized all our typos and did sex stuff in front of them   until the correct spellings came out

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If You Stare At My Nose Long Enough It Looks Like A Penis

  If You Stare At My Nose Long Enough It Looks Like A Penis   I only just noticed this yesterday   Between Trump vs. North Korea and a bad dream Involving all the women who’ve left me vs. all the women I’ve let down and I’ve been living with my nose now For a …

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Notes on Skull Island aka What if Kong Had Survived The Fall

  Notes on Skull Island aka What if Kong Had Survived The Fall   (the world is one big spoiler alert, so naturally spoilers (Kong: Skull Island) exist here too.)   Remaking the original 1933 King Kong is a pointless act, like repainting Van Gogh’s wheat fields or fucking a ukulele with a tuba on …

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The Whole Damn World vs King Kong

                             The Whole Damn World vs King Kong                Tell her your theory, Carl.             Carl has a theory?             Carl has a theory.             About what?             9/11.             Everybody has a theory about 9/11.             I know. But Carl's theory has to do with how the World Trade Center could've been …

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